20 October, 2014

Survival Relationships

Survival Relationships

When the people involved in the relationship realize that they cannot survive in it on their own, then the relationship becomes a survival relationship. The choice of partner is out of emotions and there is no match in personalities of the two. It involves both a physical and emotional relationship and the fulfilling of the basic requirements of a married life. These people are unlikely to share common interests and qualities because of which there is not much that holds together this relationship. Each person tries to provide the other person which the things he or she does not have which makes the relationship a desperate, clinging one. Sometimes the relation can also become hostile and abusive. In these relationships, the partners often abuse each other physically. The people involved become overwhelmed at any sign of affection and caring because of which they are not sure how to receive it. The partners are desperate to just have the other person around them even if they have to fight.

 However, this kind of connection gives a much better feeling than being institutionalized. Because both the partners are scared to be alone, they desperately try to find a replacement the moment they get out of one relationship. This relationship turns out to be a co dependent one.

Pastime Relationships

Pastime Relationships

The pastime relationships are generally meant for fun and recreation. There are hardly any expectations although some people allow themselves to attach hope with these relationships. Summer romance is a good example of this kind of relationship. The pastime relationship is not a long term relationship and the circumstances create an even low probability of the relationship being an enduring one. Only expectations with this relationship are those of passion, tenderness and delight.

02 October, 2014

Avoidance Relationships

Avoidance Relationships


 In avoidance relationships, the people involved try to protect themselves from falling in deep intimate relationships with the other person and do not want to share their entire feelings with them. This relationship also includes those people who have just come out of a relationship and have not gotten over the painful feelings of failure and loss of splitting. The people whose life is overshadowed with traumatic events like death of a near relative, partner or a close friend are also a part of the group of people belonging to this category. They fear that if they get very close to the new person, the painful experience will surface again. The people specially choose those partners with whom they do not have to share the deeper feelings and emotions which they want to avoid.

 Another important feature of this relationship is that the partner may be someone who does not fit into the person’s remaining life. The partner will not have the same importance and compassion as the previous partner did. In such cases, more emphasis may be given to sex as a means of controlling the painful emotions. The beginnings and endings of these relationships are often immediate. There is a low chance of self disclosure and a high amount of mistrust.