Every year thousands of couples make the choice to get married. At the same time, thousands of other couples make the choice to get divorced. When it comes to love and relationships, is it really possible to find one special person to spend the rest of your life with.
Is it Love or Just Compatibility?
As people mature from being teenagers to adults, they often feel the need to find the right person and settle down. This feeling can be enhanced if all of their friends are forming lasting relationships. The urge to find a mate at a certain age often causes people to choose partners who they feel compatible with. This feeling is not the same as love and can fade quickly when the two discover they do not have any interests in common.
On the other hand, it is possible for two people to start out as friends and have a lasting relationship develop into love. Most couples who stay married for long periods of time, find they are friends with the person they chose to partner with.
Is Your Love Based on Physical Attraction?
While people want to be physically attracted to the one they choose to have a relationship with, physical attraction should not be confused with love. Long term love requires dedication on the part of each member in the relationship. This dedication orcommitment rarely stands on physical attraction alone. People who find they constantly choose the wrong mate, should consider what criteria they use when deciding who to go out with. If physical appearance is at the top of the list, chances are they are not choosing people with substance to their character.
Create a Detailed List of Desirable Traits
Anyone looking to develop a long term relationship should start by making a list of the characteristics and traits they would like their ideal mate to have. These characteristics should include some of the more important interests of the person creating the list. For example, if someone is a sports enthusiast and gets involved with someone who is not, this conflict of interests could create a problem.
On the other hand, people should have their own interests and not need to spend all of their time together. Some of the best relationships are between people who lead fulfilling lives and share their fulfillment with each other when they spend time together. The desirable traits should include any long term goals for the relationship. This would include whether or not to have children or to own a house.
The bottom line for creating a long lasting relationship based on love is to become a self-assured individual who is not looking for someone else to complete their life. It is also a good idea to meet new people in locations other than the traditional bar scene. Become involved in groups which share your interests or volunteer. This is the best way to meet people who will share the same interests, goals and desires that you have.
