Experimental Relationships

  These relationships are just for trying out. In this relationship, a person who chooses his partners emotionally is made to choose partners who are extremely different than what he prefers. The motive of these experimental relationships is to find out the ways in which another person can be related to this person and what the relationship will become if this happens. These kinds of relationships help us in discovering new ways of interacting with each other, in ways we thought were not possible for us. It also helps in discovering those parts of one’s personality that are unknown to him and then nurturing them in order to develop them and grow. These relationships can be compared to dating which possess the quality of exploration and experimentation. The people involved in this relationship have an uncanny knack of striking a connection which clicks for the both of them and may even evolve further into a more dominant one. This type of relationship usually influences the choices of the person which help him in founding a suitable partner in the next relationship.

Read More

Transitional Relationships

 In the transitional relationships, there is a cross between the new and the old, between the patterns that people were trying to change. This helps them in handling old conflicts and issues in a better way without causing any harm to the older relationship. The people involved in this relationship can also try to find out improved ways of relating to each other and developing their characters. It is a good way of practicing for a long term relationship which is much healthier than the older one, and can sometimes even evolve into a new relationship.

 In case one of the members in the relationship gets deeply attached to the patterns of the older relationship or falls back into the same habits which led to the failure of the previous relationship, then the transitional relationship faces problems. Sometimes it even turns out to be like the relationship which led to this new relationship. This is called a transference relationship which is described later on. When the people involved in the transitional relationship have achieved their aims and worked out their problems, they can end it in a more efficient and caring manner.

Read More

Healing Relationships

 These relationships depict a period of stress, mourning, loss and struggle. The people in this relationship tend to feel fearful, dejected and wounded from inside. They do not have to be present at the same time and the same place for their mutual growth and development and quite rightly, they are not. They badly long for love and care from their partners and at the same time, they should retrospect their relation and assess themselves. These people are generally completely mismatched and do not share much in common. Their lack of fit includes their age difference which can be up to twenty years as well. These differences also involve the intelligence levels like I.Q., where a brilliant surgeon paired up with a ski instructor who is not very intelligent. The differences can also involve sexual behaviors and experiences or traumatic events in one’s past etc.

  In these kinds of relationships, physical and emotional distance from each other can prove to a healing remedy. A person who gets divorced after fifteen years of marriage marries a person whose spouse had died prematurely. At that particular time, these two people needed each other very badly and wanted to be together, opposed to the contradicting views of their family and friends. Both these people got along well because they needed to be away from their traumas and also wanted each other’s comfort. Couples in the healing relationships want to talk about their previous experiences and about the difficult times they had to face along with struggles and losses. They try to repeat these events and relive the different levels when they try to understand each other and develop a sense of compassion. Instead of passion, support, kindness and gentleness are the healing weapons in this relationship. People involved in this relationship go for plenty of trips for recreation purposes and indulge with each other. It can be said that these relationships are more play oriented rather than being work oriented. Even if this relationship comes to an abrupt end, the ending is not painful and traumatic but supportive. It is possible for people to have two or even three healing relationships at the same time. In this case, one person is going through a healing stage where as the other is going through a transitioning stage.

Read More

Types Of Relationships

  Every person in this world has some relationships with the people whom he or she interacts with. These relationships are of different types. Almost everyone has at least a rough idea in mind as to how a relationship needs to be. We wish for happy and good relationships with everyone but it is not possible. We spend a great deal of our times pondering over the meanings of our relationships, trying to compare them with relationships of other people only to find out how our relationship should be like. More often than not, we decide that our relationship is not as good as the one we compare it with. Among couples, the one who does not get divorced might be seen as a successful relationship. But in reality, couples who enjoy a healthy and happy relationship are just a handful in number. People can have many kinds of relationships with others and one relationship has to go through a number of stages itself. That is why a given relationship may be healthy at one point of time but become sour at another stage. Some relationships we cannot choose, they are with us for our entire life. But there are some which depend on our choice. These relationships are of love and friendship. We tend to choose partners who are most likely to aid us in achieving our present and future needs, desires and expectations, and also help us in growing and working through our issues. By realizing this important aspect of a relationship, a couple can live a much healthier relationship by discovering new ways of living with each other.

 At one time or the other, we must have come across couples who were completely mismatched and the most dissimilar in nature, but have learn how to live with each other and enjoy the moments spent together. Relationships are all about understanding. Yet there are some couples which indulge in mutual punishment and it is hard to imagine how they can survive with each other. Some of these couples might appear to be the perfect match for each other but end up divorced because of lack of commitment and understanding. We can make our relationships more supportive and nourishing by deepening and sharpening our understanding of the things that we do and the way we do them in a relationship. It also makes it less painful and toxic which increases the chances of the relationship becoming healthy. We will also be able to judge the extent of achievement in our relationship. A sharper and clearer picture of our existing relationships will help us in fulfilling our own needs as well as the others’ needs in a much better way.



 We have described types of relationships in this article which are grouped equally into Collateral and Dominant categories. This type of grouping is essential in determining the patterns of different relationships which into which people enter and it is also useful in describing their behavior from inside. These categorizations or groupings helped people like students, workers and clients in understanding their relationships clearly. Many of them can relate these categories to themselves because they experience whatever it describes. These categories try to collect all the important elements o every relationship with the minimum amount of judgment. Using this technique, people can find out where they are going wrong and how to pull things back.

   Types of relationships :

Collateral

• - Healing Relationships
• - Transitional Relationships
• - Experimental Relationships
• - Avoidance Relationships
• - Pastime Relationships

Dominant

• - Survival Relationships
• - Validation Relationship
• - Scripted Relationships
• - Acceptance Relationship
• - Individual Assertion Relationship
• - Transference Relationships
• - Mature Relationships
• - Romantic Relationship

• - Friendship
• - Siblings
• - Parents

Read More

How To Attract Men

  Attracting men takes a little more effort than you would think. If you think you’re God’s gift to men and that you’re going to have to beat them away with a stick, you’re wrong.

 All that is going to get you is a short term romance based on lust not love or worse, a one night stand. If you’re looking for something more than that, maybe we could shed a little light on the best way to end up with a blissful relationship.

 Contrary to what people think is the stereotype; men want more than just physical beauty, they need substance also. Sure sometimes looks attract a man, but not for keeps.

A few tips are:

•         Be comfortable with who you are. Everybody has faults, strive to be the best you can. Be confident in yourself and it will be your most attractive feature.
•         Smile. While it may not help you keep a man it will show that you are content and approachable.
•         While this may sound sexist, learn to cook. If you’re looking for a long blissful relationship, your man will want to eat. While eating out every night sounds fancy, it gets old real fast. Men still like women who are able to cook, I think it’s a mothers cooking thing.
•         Don’t act like the damsel in distress. Be a little self-reliant. In the long run men want a partner they can count on not someone they have to babysit.
•         Flirting. You may have flirted a little to get his attention. Well, don’t stop! Continue to show that you are interested. Flirting can keep that spark alive and keep that relationship vibrant for a long time.

  This next piece of advice may sound old-fashioned but it’s still true. If you’re looking for a long term relationship, look for someone that you are compatible with, someone who is close to the same social status as you are. While it may sound romantic to marry the rich young doctor, unless you are close to the same educational and social status, the strain of the differences might eventually wear the relationship out. That kind of romance is best saved for novels.

 Another piece of advice, which ties into the last paragraph is, be yourself. As in tip #1, be comfortable with who you are. Don’t try to pretend you are someone you’re not. Men will see through that fairly soon and will move on. If you’re confident with who you are men will see that and in turn they will feel more at ease and open up.
 Learning how to attract men and end up with a better chance at a long and blissful relationship is not that hard. Think about what kind of person you really are, be the best you can and look for someone that can be happy with who you are.

Read More